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10.26.2002 Just How Weird Are You? brought to you by Quizilla yeah - and i locked myself out of the house with nothing but a towel on this morning. i'm tre smooth. jernet | 3:05:55 PM| comment *** 10.23.2002i just found out someone i grew up knowing killed themselves. he lived in our house, he played out time cracking jokes and sneaking cigarettes in our backyard, he lived in my life. he moved and was living actively in other people's lives, but i kept in touch over email - well, he kept in touch, i've always sucked at that sort of thing. i can hardly believe he would ever do anything like that, but i guess that's the way these things have always gone in the past. everytime i lose someone, they lose themselves, or someone is just gone, i always wonder if there was something i could've done to keep them around longer. i wonder how life is going to be different for the people he has grown close to over the past years that he hasn't lived in nc. i can't believe jay will never play another song for me that i just think is so cool, i can't believe he will never inform my dad about how to be cool again, i can't believe he won't ever try to borrow some money or the car like a son would do, i can't believe i'll never get to hear about how nc state is so much better than the other nc schools, i can't believe that the inventor of "FOWR!" and the guy who guarded and hid my beloved pinball machine for weeks before my birthday won't ever share his smile and humor with anyone again.i guess all i can say is wow. and all i can do is remember to listen when someone is saying something . . . although i'm still left wondering why anything has to end that way. but maybe he knew what he was doing, maybe he thought it was his time, i just wish that jay hadn't been so sad or lonely or unhappy or whatever it was that just sent him over the edge. we're all just animals in this world, but we have the capacity to care for other animals of our species that aren't blood relatives or that aren't part of our reproductive possibilities, that caring is what is so important. i hate to make this so cliche and tell people to care . . . but that's all i ever have left over after i think things like this through. RIP JAY CAMPBELL october 22, 2002 jernet | 5:23:10 PM| comment *** 10.22.2002ok - so it's tuesday, thank god for my new hat b/c the fro was not going out like that when i woke up late this morning. EEK! i think my alarm clock is on the fritz . . .so i've gotten most of my tests back - the majority of them i've done a lot better on than i expected (thank goodness) - so my gpa is looking up  i'm startin to get pumped about goin to nyc next week - this time next week i'll be packin!  wheeeeeeeeeeee. the cable's out again. surprise. and my heater doesn't work. even bigger surprise. /end sarcasm here  i r cold. jernet | 12:00:14 PM| comment *** ok - so it's tuesday, thank god for my new hat b/c the fro was not going out like that when i woke up late this morning. EEK! i think my alarm clock is on the fritz . . . so i've gotten most of my tests back - the majority of them i've done a lot better on than i expected (thank goodness) - so my gpa is looking up i'm startin to get pumped about goin to nyc next week - this time next week i'll be packin! wheeeeeeeeeeee. the cable's out again. surprise. and my heater doesn't work. even bigger surprise. /end sarcasm here i r cold. jernet | 11:58:30 AM| comment *** 10.21.2002 find out what kind of driver you are . . . jernet | 3:01:26 PM| comment *** 10.20.2002so midterms are over - thank you little Lord. this weekend was fall break and it's been good times! went to see tereza in fayetteville on thursday and after a little waiting she showed up. we chilled til early in the morning and then i headed to grandma's house for lunch on friday. hung out with grandma for a while and then went back to t's. we went to the mall, i spent some money i don't have, and then we went and saw formula 51.jernet | 1:05:54 PM| comment *** |
